Sherman Ave Finds the Sexy in Satire

Reported by Puff the Magic Daddy and Old Lady Shankleworth

We at Sherman Ave, unquestionably the most important pillar of Northwestern’s comedy scene since our founding in 2011, pride ourselves on mastering the art of satire. But that’s not the whole story. Most people would be surprised to hear that Sherman Ave is actually one-third satire, and two-thirds being unfathomably sexy.

The incalculable degree of our sexiness has remained a secret for all these years because we believe that the art is more important than the artist. This is all changing however, following a unanimous decision by our Executive Board: “After countless meetings and tough discussions, we came to the conclusion that it was a moral failure on our part to deprive the student body of our physical appearances. We’re hot, and people need to know that.”

“It’s brave to be both,” said a freshman writer on being both incredibly funny and universally attractive. “Stepping into that first meeting, I knew I had found my community at Northwestern. Rock hard abs, shiny hair, cute little cupid’s bows, and pearly whites...finally, people that looked like me!” 

From the first meeting to the last, our writers only get sexier with age. One of our senior writers summed it up perfectly: “What got me in? I’m funny. What kept me here? I’ve walked in Milan Fashion Week every year since I was 8.” 

Our writers, staff, and founders were all on the same page. So what do you do with a room full of adonises, finally ready to spread their wings and fly? The answer was obvious: a photoshoot.

Hi, we’re Sherman Ave, and we’d like to reintroduce ourselves.