Does Anyone Flying into Midway Want to Split a Cinnabon?

Does anyone heading back to campus from Midway want to split a Cinnabon? When I landed and I saw the Cinnabon place right across from my gate and I was all “fuck yeah Cinnabon,” but now I’ve eaten half of it and I’m all “ugh why did I do this.” But I don’t want to waste this thing. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like glazed cinnamon pastries as much as the next guy, but this thing is like, so big. I could probably eat the rest but I’ve been trying to lose weight recently and I just looked up how many calories are in this thing. Don’t worry though you probably won’t get fat just from eating your half as I already ate all the icing.

Plus I had some chicken parmesan on the plane and I’m not so sure its sitting well with me. I might have to hit the can before I can make the hand off but I’ll wash so it’s ok. I may have to take it in there with me though.

By the way, I will cut off the parts where I bit it so you don’t have to taste a random person’s saliva. That’s what tinder is for, Wildcats.

If you’re interested please message me and tell me where we should meet up to split the Cinnabon. I’ll give you my venmo so you can send me the $2.83 that your half costs. Hopefully once I get this cinnamon roll off my hands I can figure out how I’m getting back to campus.

Sincerely, Cornelius Shartwright.