5 Tips and Tricks to Ace Sorority Recruitment
‘Tis the season my friends: sorority recruitment. In just a few days, hundreds of freshman girls—who a few months earlier had written on the Northwestern Class of 2019 page “that they were maybe looking to rush and wanted to live in Elder/Bobb!” and responded to their awkward PA Welcome Week conversations that “I just never saw myself as a sorority girl, but Northwestern seems different so ya never know!”—will be marching down Sheridan Road waiting to be sorted into one of twelve Panhellenic sororities. We know that there can be much anxiety surrounding this recruitment process, so we at Sherman Ave have compiled a list of the 5 most important tips and tricks to help you survive and thrive during rush.
Don’t forget to also eat the cucumber or lemon garnish itself. Because you know what they say: when life gives you lemons, eat them in front of sorority actives to show that you can smile even through the sourest of situations (basically a metaphor for sorority recruitment).
- Because you’ll be drinking so much water, we suggest you pee in between houses in sorority quad bushes.
Don’t waste valuable conversation time in the houses by taking a bathroom break. Sherman Ave officially recommends the steps of Fran’s or the shrubbery near Phi Mu Alpha (not a sorority, so no worries!).
If an active member says, “So, tell me about yourself,” or, “Give me your spiel”, respond with your cumulative SAT or ACT score and a breakdown section by section.
She doesn’t give a shit that you’re from Naperville and live in Allison—but if you scored above 750 on the Math section, now that can give ya some extra points.
- If an active member asks, “So how was your first quarter at NU?” you should immediately start bawling.
I don’t care if you had the time of your life dancing on booths at Bar63 and making out against the Deuce pool table or you were holed up in ISRC binge watching “The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” on Netflix and subsisting on only Hot Cheetos—cry like you’ve never cried before. Fill up your now empty cucumber water cup with a river of tears and tell her it was the worst 3 months of your young life. This way you’ll have another identifier besides being “that brunette girl who was wearing dark wash jeans and Bean Boots” AKA everyone.
- Show off your frugality and don’t let her take your coat.
Tell her your parents spent $800 on this baby and you want to get as much use out of it as possible—bang for your parents’ buck, if you will. Keep the hood up and zip it up all the way for the entire conversation. It will add an aura of mystery and really make her listen to what you are saying through the 2” of Canada Goose down padding.
So there ya have it, folks! Strap on your Sorrels, zip up your Northfaces, put on your fleece-lined leggings and drag yourself down to the quad—armed with these tips and tricks and one or two jokes about the weather, sorority recruitment should be a breeze (pun INTENDED; yes, you may steal this as one of your jokes about the Chicago wind chill factor).