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Things Overheard When My Two Friends Played Caps for the First Time

Things Overheard When My Two Friends Played Caps for the First Time

caps Ah, caps.  The chilliest drinking game around. Sitting on opposite ends of the room, throwing caps at a stein; when someone shoots into the opposite stein, the people next to that stein have to drink the full beer in the stein.  The game is played to 11, win by two.  The two new drinkers were on opposite teams, with experienced drinkers on each team.  New Drinker 1 with Experienced Drinker 1, and same for team 2.

 

Before the game:

New Drinker 1: I don’t drink very often, is that going to be a problem?

New Drinker 2: This should be pretty fun, I played beer pong once before… with water

After 1st cap sunk:

ND1: Wow, Experienced Drinker 1, you’re pretty good at this!

ND2: Alright, my first beer since Welcome week

Score is 2-4

ND1: Has it really only been two beers?

Score is 5-4

ND2: I was hoping this game would be over already… am I slurring my speech?

Score is 7-5

ED2: We have a pretty good game on our hands

ND2: This… hurts? This hurts.

Score is 8-8

ND1: Everyone is going to die.  EVERYONE IS GOING TO DIE

ND2: Guys have I achullee bun slurring mah speechiz nah funny seruszly.

Score is 10-10

ED1: ED2, how are you feeling?

ED2: feeling good, a little buzzed

ND1: *falls over on side* we da bezzzt

Score is 10-11

ND1: we’re all dead.  Im dead. We’re all dead

ED1: RIP everyone.  RIfuckingPeeeeee

Score is 11-11

ND2: This… wasn’t expected.  I need water.  I NEED LUMBAR SUPPORT NOW

ND1: *every other word to Get Back by Ludacris*

Score is 12-11

ND1: string of racial slurs

ND2: second string of slurs

*ND2 and ND1 meet in middle of room and hug*

Score is 12-12

ND1: I don’t even care if we win anymore, I just want ND2 to keep drinking

ND2: NOOOOO

Score is 14-13

ND2: Why are we not playing right now honestly what are we doing.  WHAT ARE WE DOING *takes off pants*

ND1: If the world ended… I can’t even imagine *starts tearing*

Last cap hit, score 15-13

ND1: *starts dancing*

*knees buckle*

*falls onto face*

“Is this what state school is like”

ND2: I coulda been an athlete here.  Just saying. *falls asleep*

The Northwestern Trail (An Oregon Trail Send-Up)

The Northwestern Trail (An Oregon Trail Send-Up)

Boyfriends Everywhere Suing Cinemas for Pumping Eye Irritants into Theaters Showing “The Fault in Our Stars”

Boyfriends Everywhere Suing Cinemas for Pumping Eye Irritants into Theaters Showing “The Fault in Our Stars”