SPONSORED: Save Big on Books w/ One Weird Trick!
A new year and a new quarter, but after all the holiday shopping, your pockets are feeling a little light. HOW on EARTH are you going to pay for all your class textbooks? Well, one Evanston student discovered how to save literally HUNDREDS of dollars on book shopping with one WEIRD TRICK, and he's DESPERATE to share it with YOU.
It all started when he was wandering in the DARK PARTS of the Evanston Public Library where his mother told him ABSOLUTELY NEVER TO GO. Like you, he was hoping he could find some old textbooks that he could rent or buy for BIG SAVINGS, but what he found instead CHANGED HIS LIFE FOREVER.
It was there, in the furthest reaches of the library, resting on a bone-hewn pedestal, that he found a book of TERRIFYING and UNIMAGINABLE POWER. It felt like it was made out of HUMAN SKIN, and what's more, it was warm as if it was STILL ALIVE. Though he knew he had to turn away, he found himself PHYSICALLY UNABLE to leave the book alone, and soon his eyes were darting across pages and pages of ELDRITCH LORE.
And what he found out will SHOCK you.
He discovered one little secret to ensure that he NEVER had to buy another textbook AGAIN: simply STARE INTO THE ABYSS OF CREATION UNTIL ALL THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE UNIVERSE FLOWS INTO YOU LIKE THE OCEAN FLOWS INTO A SINKING SHIP. It really is just that simple! No more overpriced bookstores! No more cheap buybacks! Just INFINITE KNOWLEDGE OF THINGS MAN WAS NOT MEANT TO KNOW.
And the best part is, he's willing to share this secret with YOU, for FREE. It's easy! Just refer this ad to three of your closest/most hated friends, and we'll send all four of you free tickets to his latest exclusive seminar titled, “BLOOD! BLOOD! THE GODS DEMAND MORE BLOOD!” But act fast! Space is extremely limited, and time is running out! Time has always been running out! Both time and space are rapidly condensing to a single point and when they do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WILL SURVIVE. Act now!