Report: Nap Marathon to counter Dance Marathon
EVANSTON—Students in Northwestern’s Bobb-McCulloch Residence Hall have formulated plans to engage in a 30-hour Nap Marathon while the rest of the student body toils away at Dance Marathon, according to sources with knowledge of the situation.
The plan for Nap Marathon reportedly was devised Friday morning when all of Bobb woke up in a condition described as “hungover as fuck.”
“We were awakened by some chick on Dancer Relations running through the hall yelling how excited she was,” said a Weinberg sophomore who was granted anonymity to speak candidly about NM’s motivations. “That’s when we realized that we liked sleeping more than helping children with epilepsy.”
After texting a few friends to see if they’d be interested in forming a Nap Marathon Executive Board, the Weinberg sophomore proceeded to take a quick nap.
“It was nice,” the source said. “I liked it because I was sleeping.”
Although details remain hazy this point, inside sources confirm that the Bobb residents will sleep from Friday at 6 p.m. to Sunday at 12 a.m. with no interruptions.
“All the people who would normally interrupt our napz will be quarantined in a tent by the lake,” a School of Comm junior on NM Exec said. “It’s perfect really. Our only fear is if they escape.”
No member of DM Exec was willing to speak on the record, but an anonymous individual highly involved with Dance Marathon urged those considering joining Nap Marathon to reconsider.
“BUT DM WILL CHANGE YOU,” the person said. “SERIOUSLY. IT CHANGES YOU.”