Please Don’t Look for Pokemon in the Holocaust Museum Unless You’re Also On Team Mystic
In the past, we at the Holocaust Museum have been very tolerant of the use of social media on our grounds. We encourage visitors to use Facebook, Instagram, and such services to share stories of how our exhibitions on the victims of Nazism moved and educated them. However, we must set our foot down, and insist that visitors to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum not play the new mobile game Pokemon Go in the museum, unless they are also on Team Mystic.The Holocaust Museum is a place to remember those millions of lives that perished under a fascist regime bent on taking over the entire world--much like those bastards on Team Valor who have been ruthlessly expanding, taking over many PokeGyms that are rightfully the territory of Team Mystic. It is out of respect for the victims of the Holocaust, and because we have a ton of sick Pokemon here and we don’t want Instinct or Valor getting stronger, that we prohibit the play of Pokemon Go unless you’re also on Team Mystic. While some may criticize our move, saying it is hypocritical to only allow some of our guests to play Pokemon Go, we believe that these people are probably Team Instinct losers and should get the fuck away from our PokeStop. I just put down a lure, and the Pokemon it attracts are for Team Mystic only, so back off, chump. Yesterday, I caught a CP295 Koffing by the Gas Chamber display, and a bunch of amazing Ghastlys in the room with the confiscated shoes of Auschwitz prisoners. And they’re all for Team Mystic. Team Mystic for life, Mystic above all. Finally, the Holocaust Museum would like to remind its visitors that it is perfectly acceptable to play Kim K Hollywood while in the Museum.