"My Body Is A Wasteland": Reworking a John Mayer Classic for Reading Week

"My Body Is A Wasteland" 

Jenny Talia presents reworked version of John Mayer’s classic, “Your Body is a Wonderland”

***HIGHLY RECOMMENDED: listen to the original song while reading “My Body is a Wasteland” (link here) ***

I got the afternoon technically there’s room for two One thing I've left to do Discover me Discovering food

One mole to every inch of my skin like pepperonis One pair of chap-ped lips and my badly burnt tongue (from the blisteringly hot egg roll I didn’t chew or swallow)

And if I want love It must be bacon Swim in a deep sea Of Fireball Take all my diet plans And break 'em I am bound to be a whale

My body is a wasteland My body is a waste (I eat exclusively with my hands) My body is a wasteland

Something 'bout the way the hair falls off my head I am an obese snake when crawling towards the Frito-Lays Alcohol tells me where to go and though I will leave to find it I'll never let your barf hit the bed without my own behind it

You want love? I’m incapable Swimming in a deep sea Of bong rips Take all my life plans And break 'em I am bound to be a fail(ure)

My body is a wasteland My body is a waste (I only eat with my hands) My body is a wasteland (I'll never stand again... I’ll use an ambulance)

Damn food baby You frustrate me I know you're mine, all mine, all mine But I look so bulbous it hurts all the time

My body is a wasteland (I'll never speak again... too many Marlboro Reds) My body is a waste (I eat exclusively with my hands) My body is a wasteland (I'll never stand again... I'll use an ambulance) My body is the teenage wasteland

(Dolla menu dolla menu dolla menu dolla menu 6x)