Freshman Guide to Bonding With Your PA Group by Solving a Murder
Welcome home, Wildcats!! You’re a freshman, so the first week at school is bound to bring new friends, new crushes, and that dead body your PA group stumbled upon in an alleyway.
Let me guess: you guys were on your way to meet your PA at the Lakefill when you decided to try a new shortcut. Then came the stench. You’d recognize that smell anywhere – rotting flesh!
Sure, finding a dead body in an alley can be disgusting. Scarring, even. But it can also be the perfect ice breaker, and something that has the potential to bond your PA group (FOR LIFE)!!
Meghan, your eager Sophomore PA, had tried so hard to get you guys to like each other, but none of you seemed to click. You played get-to-know you games, solved puzzles, and even did an escape room. Nothing worked – until you stumbled upon the greatest puzzle of them all. Who the heck killed this guy you all found in an alley?
Here are five simple steps to ensure your PA group solves this murder and becomes BEST FRIENDS FOR LIFE:
1. Establish an Alibi
You need to make sure the police don’t think it's one of you guys who killed this person. Talk about a bad first impression on campus, right? An important part of bonding is trust - so make sure everyone knows you all have each other’s backs AND are willing to testify matching alibis in front of a court of law.
2. Research Suspects
Who would want to kill this innocent person? And why? Look for fibers and fingerprints that you guys can take in for evidence. Don’t be afraid to take the bonding even further and spend quality time in some of the Tech labs while you cross-analyze the evidence!
3. Acquire a search warrant and perform a Citizen’s Arrest on the most guilty suspect
STORM THE RESIDENCE OF THE MOST GUILTY SUSPECT AND HANDCUFF THEM.
4. Realize the culprit was actually Tim from your PA group, and that you had framed the wrong suspect all along, who will now slowly rot in prison.
Who knew! You did get a little bit of an unchill vibe from Tim when he said his underrated superpower would be getting away with first-degree murder. But he said he was from Central Florida, so you let it pass under the radar as a cultural difference. Meghan leads a True Northwestern Dialogue to check in with everyone’s different viewpoints on the murder, which gives Tim a chance to voice his perspective, too. Ultimately, you forgive him.
5. Go Get Andy’s and hang out!
We recommend the Boot Daddy. Sooo good!