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3 Spooky Drugs You Should Do This Halloween

3 Spooky Drugs You Should Do This Halloween

Ziploc bags = Party Time (via CBC) Halloween is here and it wouldn’t be a spooky, scary holiday without getting totally fucked up beyond the point of no return. Sure, you can drink Halloween themed jungle juices if you’re some trick ass mark who only goes out on weekends. But, this is the list for people who don’t care about school or their families and just want to TURN THE FUCK UP this Halloween!!!

 

Zombie Food

Sudafed

Xanax

Cocaine

Raspberry-Prozac Vinaigrette

Grab the Xanax and the Sudafed from your roommate’s desk. The cocaine you’re going to have to get from my boy Jared. He’s usually posted up by ETHS. Also, ask him any question you have concerning the vinaigrette. He may or may not have it but his common law wife Tina definitely has it. Once you do all the prep, put the pills into a Slap Chop and slap them up four or five times. Once the pills are fine enough to be snorted, dash some coke into the powder and mix the ingredients together by shaking up a Ziploc bag. Finally, sprinkle that vinaigrette into the bag and you got yourself some snortable and spooky Zombie Food!

 

Ghost Ash

Ketamine

Marijuana (Indica)

Cinnamon Sugar Mescaline

Jared definitely has weed. He’s also pretty reasonable with prices. The ketamine is going to be harder to come by. Jared refuses to be caught with it again, so for some good Special K, you’re going to have to go see Sketchy Rick, one of Jared’s scarier friends. You’re going to have to UBER to his place in Edgewater to get it. If you bring the pot and the Cinnamon Sugar Mescaline (Tina has this on Tuesdays typically), he can make you a smokeable form of Ghost Ash, so it’s worth the trip.

 

The Devil’s Son

Molly Water

Pumpkin Spice Codeine  

Dry Ice

This one is fast and simple. The molly and codeine are readily available from, you guessed it, my main hitta Jared. Once you’re finished with Jared, you’re going to have to go Jewel or something to buy Monin pumpkin spice syrup. As you let the molly dissolve in some Perrier (mineral water is extra spooky), pump eight or nine squirts of the pumpkin spice syrup into the the Codeine. Once the molly has fully dissolved into the Perrier, mix it with the pumpkin spice codeine using a martini shaker. Put some dry ice in that drink (it won’t get you high but it is spooky) and you got yourself a delectable party drug drink for Halloween!

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Dear Mother Nature, Fuck You

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